Yes, I gave up on love not because I don’t love you but because I know you don’t.
I tried really hard to make myself understand that it’s soon going to be alright. I apologized for everything I didn’t do. Because I loved you unconditionally.
Those long waits to see you. My calls and text that remained unanswered. For each time you lied, I convinced myself for that being your last. You were clueless about the emotional damage you did to me. I invested genuine emotions in you but maybe they were inadequate . As time passed by my wounds cracked open and the scars are hardest to heal. I slowly started giving up on you.
You slept sound, I befriended insomnia. I was left with disappointments and unanswered question. Maybe because you didn’t had one. You blamed me for everything. I know I made mistakes at times. Were they not forgivable? I fought for you, you fought with me. Was this my mistake?
In spite of you being so insensitive towards me, I hoped to make it for you. I did everything to please you so that you love me. Maybe I was nothing more than the smoke of your drag.
Do you remember the day when I begged you to stay? Your silence killed me every moment. How could you remain silent?
Couldn’t you see my tears? I stood there crying while you simply walked away.
I was drowning while you left me in the middle of the ocean. But in the fear of drowning, I learned to swim.
When my presence appeared to be unwanted, I realized it’s time to set myself free. It’s time to unlove. What did I lose? I lost my happiness and self-respect. I lost the ability to love someone again. My heart remained cold and bloodless. I feel numb. The saddest part is that I still don’t hate you. There is no place for love or hatred for anyone in my heart. I choose to be cautious and guarded. I cut all ties of forgiveness and revenge.
After a month,
“I am getting married, Bye”. My phone slipped out of my hands when I saw your message. You were getting married that too on my birthday. Did you even remember that? Did he care a bit? Or at all? But I had to reply something. So all I could say was,” Congratulations, I hope at least this relationship of yours last”. I felt a bit better thinking I’m not stuck anymore. I can live my life on my own terms now. I want to love again for sure but I will wait because when it happens it will be my last and forever one.
I am not scared of falling in love. But, I merely gave up on you.
PS: I have fallen in love again..this time with myself.
I would love to read your thought on this. Feel free to like, share and comment.
Lovely one.. the moment one understands the truth and begins to love himself or herself is when true happiness begins..
http://wp.me/pONsJ-7P
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Thanks alot.
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A heart ❤️ touching story. Well written. Made me emotional. Lovely.
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Thanks!
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